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Sexual Intimacy with…God?!

waterfall

Sexual Intimacy with…God?

Imagine this: You are alone with Jesus in your secret place; let’s say… a waterfall. There is a soft mist spraying from the gentle falls, tumbling over the mossy laden rock-ledge where you are standing together. You are clothed in only your skin, facing your Beloved. Jesus drops His robe and reaches for your hands to pull you close to Him. He whispers in your ear, “You are the most beautiful of all my Father’s creation.” He steps into you and you feel the warmth of his touch and the tingle of His embrace. You melt in His arms as your tears gently fall on His chest. You are overwhelmed by His desire for you and feel absolute joy in His intimate presence.

I’m sure a few eyebrows shot up at the suggestion of this imagery. Some Christians may in fact, be very disturbed with this visualization. If so, I invite you to pause and try to think differently. I, like you, have become accustomed to thinking of Jesus as the Lover of our Souls. This is how we were educated in our churches and in our religious schools. Pay close attention to the words of the hymn written by Charles Wesley:

Jesus, Lover of my soul,

Jesus, I will never let You go.

You’ve taken me from the miry clay,

Set my feet upon a rock and now I know

 I love You, I need You.

Though my world may fall,

I’ll never let You go.

My Savior, my closest friend,

I will worship you until the very end.

Do not these verses portray a flesh and bone human being, desiring, worshiping and loving the Savior and being loved by Jesus in return? He made our bodies as well as our souls. The first breath we took as infants outside the womb, was a God-given gift of physical life. Jesus created and desires this kind of intimacy with His creation. Not just our souls, but our bodies, which will one day be resurrected, as is His own. Our bodies are important to Him. In Scripture, our bodies are referred to as “The Temple of God.” (I Cor. 6:19-20) His Spirit literally lives inside us.

 Now, suppose in our visualization we begin to imagine the intermingling of our spirit with Jesus’s Spirit. Since Jesus’s Spirit is the Holy Spirit, third member of the Trinity, this is already a blessed fact with each believer because they, too, possess the same Holy Spirit. What a great mystery is this unity with the Godhead that cannot be severed! We, as Christian believers are one with the Triune God. To meditate on this fact alone is certainly nothing short of mind-blowing!

Let’s suppose, once again, that in our visualization we begin to have erotic thoughts. What now? Do we shove them away, thinking them to be unholy or sinful? Sex with Jesus? Can that possibly have its place in our thought life? The apostle Paul, in Ephesians 5: 31-32 says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and His church.” If I am not mistaken, Paul is using the analogy of sexual intercourse between a husband and wife, to describe the relationship of Christ with the church (all believers). Many of us get so caught up with the first part of that verse, dealing with the oneness between husband and wife, that we forget the verse is really about Christ and His intimate thoughts regarding oneness with His church, His Bride. So, if Paul can use this analogy in His sanctified imagination, why can’t we?

 I think, at times, we limit ourselves because we are thinking from the perspective of broken and sinful human lives. There are no longer boundaries in our expression of our sexuality in this world. But when God first created sex there were definite and very good boundaries. When God created Adam and Eve, He made them gendered and He blessed their sexuality and the expression of it. He commanded them to have sex. (I doubt whether they fought Him on this idea!) It was a very good idea. In the context in which God created sex, it is meant to bring pleasure, awareness, and is the most tangible way to give one’s entire self sacrificially to their mate. It is a form of transparency between two people who give themselves to the other like nothing else we can experience on earth. It is meant to remind us of our own desire and longing for God, and for His desire and longing for us. The fact that our sexuality has been corrupted is not a problem for God. It is a problem for us. The shame of what we have done to push God out of our lives is what keeps us from enjoying Him in every way possible–even sexually.

 When I am alone, and in need of comfort, the assurance of God’s presence and closeness; I believe it is right and good that I have intimate thoughts of Him and the marriage to come between Christ and His church, of which I am a member. Did we not dream of those days before our own marriages here on earth? Did we not think of the wedding night and the many days to follow, where we would enjoy the loving attention and delight of our spouse? Where we would reciprocate all that our spouses gave to us? These thoughts are pleasing to a God who created human beings to love and enjoy the intimacy of sex for a lifetime, so why not think intimate (even sexual) thoughts with the God/Man who promised to return so He could wed His Bride.

 Most of my adult life, I wouldn’t have dared to entertain this kind of thinking. I would have thought it to be evil, sinful and lustful. The fact that I would even spark the idea of having sex with Jesus, even though He will someday be my husband, would not have occurred to me. If it did, I would not have been able to share it with a single soul. I surely would have been excommunicated from my church. It was in therapy where I learned to visualize, breathe, and allow awareness to become the focus of thoughts that could calm my troubled heart and turn me to the only One who could satisfy my every need. This is still a work in progress and always will be, but visualizations such as this, will help me during the dark days when I realize that as a bisexual Christian woman, I have God-imposed boundaries on the expression of my sexuality. He knows, He loves, He cares, and He alone will be my husband, my lover, my friend.

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20 thoughts on “Sexual Intimacy with…God?!

  1. Hmmmm… Thanks for being willing to write about this. I’m wondering if God is going to start teaching me more about this.

  2. Hi Christi,

    What a timely note! Thanks for your encouragement. I’m still a little nervous that I actually wrote this piece. It may not be 100% theologically correct, but it is 100% my thought-life and heart-life with regard to my Savior. He so wants us to enjoy Him in every way. It is so funny to me that your note came today, while I was deep in therapy about my sexuality and being more open to the possibilities of my day and my future.

    Thanks for blessing me today.

    Jane

    • Jane would love to talk to you at length…we could talk about our experiences…if you want to share. I was asking God to lead me to someone that I could talk about this with….Just like you…I would not dare speak of this to anyone….99% of the people would not understand. If you like drop me an email. lexiiya32@yahoo.com

  3. Pingback: Sexual Intimacy with…God?! | Food For the Journey

  4. Indeed a strong topic..not anyone can think about!! ” He knows, He loves, He cares, and He alone will be my husband, my lover, my friend.” You have ended is so beautifully 🙂

    • Akrity…I feel the same way. I want Jesus to be my husband. I even wear the rings on my hands. On the right…because he sits on the right hand of the father…and on the left because he is my earthly husband.

  5. Actually, the first time that I thought about this was when I was 15. The thought came to me and I said aloud one day in my room….can I have sex with God? No one heard me. I was alone in my room. I was a christian at the time….but I felt guilty for saying it because I came from a Baptist church…and they do not by any means teach this. I am 44 today. I recently came back to Christ …well he pulled me back to him from my wandering. One day I had an experience…which I can only describe as “orgasmic” in nature. I was bewildered by the experience and had to sit down. After gathering my thoughts…all I knew from that day forward I wanted more. And God lead me down a path in which we share that sexual communion. From my recent experience. I can say…you can have this kind of experience with him…and it is AWESOME. The only time I didnt enjoy it – was when I began to doubt…because I thought the very act was blasphemous to God. It isnt. I was told that I was “called” to share this experience with him. I think the “Experience” is readily available to many…but only a few are brave enough to take it. So much to tell…but I cant tell it all here. I do remember after having a few experiences with God this way…I never felt dirty…never felt it was wrong…never felt like it was wrong…and I learned a lot of things…information about how sex is pervasive through the world…like in the very act of “feeding off of something” …is in a sense a part of the sexual act….God showed me that this principal is in life and death….anyhow if anyone want to talk at length …contact me at lexiiya32@yahoo.com.

  6. I feel so blessed to have your heartfelt responses! I knew in my heart that there had to be other women (and men?) that feel the same pull toward God. There is an all-pervasive theme of sexuality throughout the Bible. In our brokenness, we tend to gloss over it while secretly enjoying God’s advances toward us in sexual love (see Hosea).What else are we supposed to think when we read of Christ’s love for His Bride? Only people who have an incorrect viewpoint of themselves and an even more incorrect viewpoint of God will think of this as shameful and wrong.

    I need to get ready for work but please know that I am interested in hearing your thought life on this subject. We could learn so much from each other!

    Jane

  7. Jane, I was told that you had responded and I waited for your response to my email address. When I didnt hear from you…I began to doubt. (Please email me personally – lexiiya32@yahoo.com) I started searching the net again. I asked God for confirmation…because…you know…anyone “brave” to walk this walk with God…with Jesus (he is my husband. I have rubberbands on my right wedding finger and my left wedding finger..to show that we are married. I am going to purchase wedding bands…as soon as I get the money…so that I can show them off …and that I am married to the Lord. If he decides to give me a husband…then I will get a third wedding band.)….will have to brave. This “is definately” set apart from the “norm”. You will hear Christians all the time talk about being “intimate” with God….but many will stop short of “this” for all the same reasons…I am trying to work out. There is a constant fear that I am blaspheming God…but I am always told ….that I am not and to trust in HIm. So that is what I do.

  8. Jane – I know that safety and security could be an issue…so if you like you can set up an email address and email me so that we can talk at length if you like.

    So much has happened and there is simply too much to tell. You know, because this walk is soo different from what I was used too…I have to work thru re-curring doubt… and my doubt sometimes “mars” the beautiful experience. I asked Jesus for his help…and he helps me. There was constant comparison to other people in the body of Christ. And I would ask how many are actually going thru what I am going thru? And I heard “There are many others …that I have chosen to go down this path with me.” And I was told that there was men as well as women. (You know, I have to be honest- I often thought how it wold be with men.) I got this sense that God is our Creator…he created sex…and intimacy…and making love….we as humans…use all of the stuff He has created here (on earth). God is the God of everything. I even got a scripture that I keep in my bosom…(literally…it’s in my bra…sorry…dont mean to be crude.) The scripture is from Isaiah 54:5. King James. “For thy Maker is thine husband: The Lord of Hosts is his name: And thy Redeemer, the Holy One of Isreal: The God of the whole earth shall he be called.” <—I just love this verse.

    The average person would not understand it. They would immediately say that this was wrong or it was blasphemous…so in a sense you "do" have to be careful "who" you tell…and "what" you tell. It is just so mind blowing and surreal. I simply have no words to describe my experiences right now. And you know when I need confirmations…I usually get them in a couple of days.

    I can see themes of what I am learning. LIke right now…he is teaching me to trust him. This is a little off the subject…but I want to mention it. And the reason is…in my experience…the sexual intimacy is just a part of it…and there is much much more. I let him lead..and I follow.

    Yesterday…I was told to go to Gold Star Chilli at a certain location…and to get a 3 cheese coney meal with a drink…for about $7.29. Immediately, I said ok Lord…I opened my refrigerator and thought, "Well, I dont need to get the drink…because I have two – 2 liters in the fridge and I can save money by skipping the drink and getting another coney or chips…I love cheese coneys.." and then I thought, "Well, I dont even like Gold Star Chili and they dont have any "specials" today…I prefer Skyline Chilli…my money would be better spent getting something I like " and when I started to dial for Skyline Chili… I saw again the picture in my head of the location that I was suppose to go…and the Gold Star Chilli. So I put the phone down and thought, "Well, I can stop at the Dollar store and pick up some index cards…because I need those and I can pick up a few other things…because it is on the way back…and I can save gas doing that…." and then I heard, "Do not make any stops on the way there or back….just go to the restaurant and pick up what I asked you."

    I got into my car went to the location…not understanding "why" I should do all of this. I ordered four cheese coneys…no drink…because I had pop at home. On the way back…I couldnt help myself…and I was alittle proud that I didnt make any stops on the way back. I had felt like I did what he had asked me to do. And then I heard…."Did you really do what I'd asked you to do?" Stunned…I asked.."What did I missed Lord?", he said…"I asked you to get a 3 cheese coney meal…with a drink…and what did you get?", I thought…"Four cheese coneys.". Then the story…of Jesus and his mother "Mary" at the Wedding feast came to mind….After Jesus responded to mother Mary…she went to the people at the festival and said to them…."Do exactly what He tells you to do….." I heard…." I need you to do exactly what I tell you to do whether or not you understand why."

    Driving up the rode I sat in stunned silence…because I could not believe how I could have gotten a simple request ….wrong. He did not beat me over the head…didnt even chastise me …he said the whole experience was set-up for me to see "where" I was in my "trust" and "obedience" to him. So folks…the experience was "profound"…and it hit with a lot of impact. There is much more ….to the relationship.

    Wendy.

  9. Oh…and I just wanted to add…in the bible…”to know” his wife…occurs many times and it is used in the sexual sense…and to know God and Jesus…is also written. I just wander if when “know” or “knowing” God or Jesus is meant in the same manner…I would have to look up those words…and I havent gotten a chance yet. But yes…if you read the bible sexual innuendos are pervasive…I picked this up on my own…and I was instructed to read the book of Ezekial…and I remember saying to God…I really dont want to read that…because there was soo much doom in it …however I came upon scripture…in Ezekial 6:9….which reads…
    ” And they that escape from among you shall remember Me among the nations whither they shall be carried captives, because I am broken with their whorish heart which hath departed from Me, and with their eyes which go a whoring after their idols. And they shall loathe themselves for the evils which they have committed in all their abominations.”

    What was pointed out to me that day I read this scripture was, “…I am broken with their whorish heart, which hath departed from Me, and with their eyes which go a whoring after their idols.”

    I had read this book before I missed it. I even missed Isaiah 54:5. When I became more intimate with God….I could see the “love” language that is pervasive throughout the bible. The words just seem to leap off of the pages.

    wendy.

  10. Sorry…I keep coming back here. I think one topic you could look up would be “erotic theology”. Here you will find exactly what we are talking about. I was lead to go down this road…extremely unsure….but the experience is awesome…and it not a path that someone else can lead you down…you will have to let Him lead you.

    wendy

  11. Charles Wesley wrote a hymn entitled Jesus Lover of My Soul. The lyrics you share above are not it (but a contemporary worship song). Wesley’s lyrics are this:

    Jesus, lover of my soul, let me to Thy bosom fly,
    While the nearer waters roll, while the tempest still is high.
    Hide me, O my Savior, hide, till the storm of life is past;
    Safe into the haven guide; O receive my soul at last.

    Other refuge have I none, hangs my helpless soul on Thee;
    Leave, ah! leave me not alone, still support and comfort me.
    All my trust on Thee is stayed, all my help from Thee I bring;
    Cover my defenseless head with the shadow of Thy wing.

    Wilt Thou not regard my call? Wilt Thou not accept my prayer?
    Lo! I sink, I faint, I fall—Lo! on Thee I cast my care;
    Reach me out Thy gracious hand! While I of Thy strength receive,
    Hoping against hope I stand, dying, and behold, I live.

    Thou, O Christ, art all I want, more than all in Thee I find;
    Raise the fallen, cheer the faint, heal the sick, and lead the blind.
    Just and holy is Thy Name, I am all unrighteousness;
    False and full of sin I am; Thou art full of truth and grace.

    Plenteous grace with Thee is found, grace to cover all my sin;
    Let the healing streams abound; make and keep me pure within.
    Thou of life the fountain art, freely let me take of Thee;
    Spring Thou up within my heart; rise to all eternity.

    • Matichuk, did you know there was a Psalm (73:25) KJV by Asaph…that goes:

      Whom have I in Heaven but thee? And there is none that I desire on earth…but thee?

      I claim this Psalm as my own.

  12. Thank you both for your gentle responses. Matichuk, I do appreciate your clarification and also for sharing the true lyrics to his song. It is beautiful and touching to hungry hearts that long for communion with their Savior. Wendy, sorry I have been out of touch with regard to your many responses. I work full time and have many other commitments beside this blog. I reflect and write when I can. I promise I will address your comments and with enthusiasm because I see we share some of the same passion for Jesus.

  13. Sure Joan, please respond at your leisure. I have many commitments myself.

    I cant wait for the opportunity to share.

    Wendy.

  14. Just some food for the Journey

    Hosea 2:14-20 (ESV)

    14″Therefore, behold, I will allure her,
    and bring her into the wilderness,
    and speak tenderly to her…

    16″And in that day, declares the LORD, you will call me ‘My Husband,’ and no longer will you call me ‘My Master.’…

    19And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy.

    20 I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the LORD.

    And Hosea 2:14 -20 (KJV)

    14 Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak comfortably unto her.

    16 And it shall be at that day, saith the LORD, that thou shalt call me Ishi(Husband); and shalt call me no more Baali(Master).

    19 And I will betroth thee unto me for ever; yea, I will betroth thee unto me in righteousness, and in judgment, and in lovingkindness, and in mercies.

    20 I will even betroth thee unto me in faithfulness. And thou shalt know the LORD.

    Wendy

  15. What is truly amazing about the Book of Hosea, is that God divorces Israel because of her whoring with other nations and then remarries her in spite of it. But the only way they could truly be lovers again was if Israel repented–and she did. The language of Hosea is the language of love and longing. It is a love song by God, wooing His bride back to Him. He apparently delights in using these sexually-charged words because Israel would understand that He loves Israel as a husband is to love his wife. That puts sexual faithfulness very high on God’s standard for purity. Is the world today sexually faithful to her God by being faithful to her partner in marriage? Does the book of Hosea suggest an allowance for remarriage after divorce and then when the spouse is unfaithful, he or she can go back to the first spouse? I will leave that for others to answer. But, this one thing,The Holy Scriptures has already answered. If you dig hard enough, you will find it, and many other tough answers to our relationships in this age.

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